you ever come across (or in this case, have dropped in an email thread sans comment) a report that makes you wonder if God has us all on an extended viewing of Candid Camera? even trying to come up with a simple blog post title had me troubled.
the short version of the story is this: woman meets someone on Facebook. they interact and woman starts to catch feelings. they agree to meet up at a hotel and plan to have sex, but woman is told that due to surgery scars, she will have to be blindfolded. she agreed. this happened MORE THAN ONCE before she felt something was wrong – took off the blindfold and…
it was her female best friend!!!
(i’ll wait for you to recover from that one).
so.. because it’s friday and i’m still terribly perplexed, here are my top 8 questions that need answers about this case.
8. with Facebook making perfectly legit accounts be verified or shutdown, how does one exactly get away with doing this there? i know they haven’t gotten to everyone, and i guess if she used a real fake name and fake pictures – there’s nothing to suspect that the gender of the person behind the account isn’t what it seems.
7. i’m all for a good romantic story. i’ve fallen for words and let my heart led me outside of my country – but, like i ask every single time MTV’s Catfish comes across my Twitter feed – in the year two thousand and fifteen, how is it possible to have NEVER visually seen. HOW?
6. they did have phone conversations it seems, and the victim heard a high-pitched voice. that alone didn’t set off alarm bells?
pause: humans have their own animal/natural instincts. how we get ourselves into trouble is by ignoring the yellow flags. i know there were probably plenty before it even got to the meet in person point, but loneliness and the ache for a fairy-tale ending makes many people do silly things.
5. as a woman, in what universe is it a smart thing to do to meet a stranger in a hotel and agree to being blindfolded? i’m not one for victim blaming…but there’s a fine line between it and personal responsibility. i’m all for some 50 shades of grey…but most definitely after seeing that person. you’ve been chatting and interacting… isn’t the first thing you want to do
a) confirm they are someone you would still be physically attracted to
b) at the very least give them a hug for all the pain and suffering they had gone through?
4. foreplay. while not a requirement for some – is generally pretty common. my brain can’t compute the lack of it. like you just want from 0-60 with no pre-game warm up? WITH A STRANGER? after you’ve been with someone a while (and you are pressed for time) – you may not have the time or need for that. but in having sex and getting to know if your melodies will harmonize…i..just..
3. the senses. any sexual experience is about the taste, touch, smell, sight and hearing of the person. all of those are engaged as you explore another person. when you choose to eliminate one (or more), the other senses usually heighten to compensate.
without getting too…x-rated (too late?) – the touch of um..plastic isn’t the same as flesh. nor the smell. nor the ta– you get the point.
2. not 1, not 2, not 3, not 4 but FIVE TIMES.
per the court report:
When I was having sex I grabbed for the back of his head and my hand got caught on something. It did not feel right. I was sat on the bed, he was standing up.
Something in my mind said ‘pull it (the blindfold) off, pull it off’. I just pulled it off. Gayle was just standing there… I just couldn’t believe it, I couldn’t believe it.
Straight away she held her hand down over her face and said ‘it’s not what you think’
1. so if it’s not what she thinks.. WHAT IS IT? like… what it SEEMS like is you duped your BFF into having sex. you did this when there’s a whole community of women who be more than happy to be the recipient of same-gender sex.
i’m sure if i thought about it some more – i would come up with more questions. but i’m already confused enough.
in the end, i feel bad for the woman. while yes, this is something she brought on herself – i can’t imagine what this will do to her emotionally and mentally for years to come.
what’s your word? are you just as confused as i am?